Beth asks: Hi. I am 16 weeks pregnant with my first baby. I am obviously really excited (and anxious too!) and have been doing a lot of reading to prepare myself for the labour and new baby. I know my husband is excited too, but at times he seems a bit disconnected from the whole thing. I am just wondering what I could do to help include him and make him feel more involved in the whole process? 

Jamie Hocking (Pregnancy coach) says:
Congratulations on your pregnancy. Your question comes at a great time because I have just written an eBook called Bonding With Baby: Eight Simple Ways Parents Can Strengthen Their Bond With Baby Before Birth. One reason I have written this book is because it is very common for the father-to-be to feel left out during pregnancy.

Many times, dads just don’t know what they can do to support you and to bond with baby so it’s great that you are looking out for ways to help your partner feel involved. Some of the things that you can encourage your partner to do include talking, singing, and reading to your baby. This is an easy way for dads to feel connected with baby. Keep in mind that as your pregnancy progresses, your baby will begin to get used to the voices she is hearing outside of the womb and by talking, singing and reading your baby will get to know her daddy’s voice. 

Another tip I have is to name your baby if possible. This can help the baby seem more real to both you and your partner. If your baby’s gender is unknown, you could choose a nickname instead of a proper name. Touch is another beautiful way to create a bond between dads and babies. You can encourage your partner to touch or rub your belly. When you’re feeling your baby moving, you can place your partner’s hands on the places you are feeling baby. In time, dad should be able to feel the baby moving too. You can also get your partner to massage your baby bump, which is a lovely expression of love for both you and your baby. 

Many fathers have also found that taking a comprehensive childbirth education program can help them feel more involved. I teach the Hypnobirthing Australia program and one of our goals in the program is to help dads bond before, during and after birth. 

If you’re interested in learning more about bonding with your baby before birth, visit to get a free copy of my eBook! Best wishes for a mindful pregnancy and a blissful birth.

(Jamie Hocking is the Director of Mindful Pregnancy, a service that provides pregnancy coaching and hypnobirthing classes).